It has been a long time (okay, since Adorable) since I have had such a strong craving to be with someone, but Lovah got it going on. His tongue has magical and addictive properties. He makes me sizzle, sigh & scream all at the same time. I have had to go a week without my "drug" of choice and I am as jittery as a junky waiting on the next fix. Lovah is quite the tease too...a coochie tease. There--I think I have coined a new phrase and about damn time too! Tonight, I am shooting for three trips to heaven spread out over several hours....I am ready to go.

Ready or not Lovah, here I come....................

Labels: coochie tease, Lovah, sex, weekend

I don't recall the conversation, but I must have told my gentleman friend about the phenomenon that occurs when I am in Mexican restaurants. I am sure, based on his reaction of raised eyebrows, that he put it down as the ramblings of a woman who thought too highly of herself.

I always get excellent service in Mexican restaurants when I am waited upon by men. I have even had the cook come out to serve me personally. Sometimes I have even had every male worker in the restaurant stop by my table to enquire if I needed anything. Today not every male in the place, but certainly two or three, stopped by to make sure that my companion and I were doing okay. My man can also confirm that not a bit of flirting was done by me to encourage the additional attention. Merely a "gracias" tendered in gratitude for my jumbo margarita. My companion swears that is all it took to kindle the fire.

When we finally left the restaurant, my dear friend was laughing as he agreed that I indeed provoked such reaction--the Mexi Mystique. He stated that he did not even exist to them as we walked out of the restaurant as all attention was focused on me (or more aptly--the phenomenal tits). What can I say? Perhaps I release a pheromone that is targeted only toward the male Hispanic population because they are the ones that I seem to affect the strongest without even attempting to. What do you think Utenzi, the science guy--is such a thing possible????????

Regardless, the mystique seems to extend to certain effects in the bedroom and I am a bit worn out from all the pleasure-seeking that took place between the silk sheets. Don't know when the tingling will cease from being feasted upon. I think my toes are permanently curled and my god! the constant orgasms--I honestly did not think so many were possible in such a short period of time. I think my sassy mystique hit the jackpot and damn I want to ride that wave as long as possible.

Labels: mystique, pheromones, sex, silk sheets, Utenzi, weekend

I was in the midst of a chocolate fit when I grabbed up an almond Snickers earlier this week. In big bold letters was the phrase "Now more satisfying". That mystified me. How did this candy bar become more satisfying? I am not the only one asking this question. Candyblog analyzed the more satisfying Snickers and compared to the old. Still, with a bump in calories and the taste being relatively the same...how could Snickers be more satisfying?

When I raised this question with a certain gentleman he told me an interesting story. In his wild college days he was friends with a lesbian couple and the one young lady mentioned that she liked to put a Snickers in the freezer. She would then take the frozen candy bar and insert it into her girlfriend and eat it (and I guess the gf too).

I guess that is one way the Snickers could be more satisfying. I don't mind the occasional whipped cream on my phenomenal tits, but for now--keep the frozen Snickers outta my knickers.

Labels: Satisfying, sex, Snickers

I was a wee bit bored with how life has come to a grinding halt so I took myself off to sashay in front of book boy. Book boy was nowhere to be seen when I got there so I just started browsing amongst the book aisles to kill some time. I was perusing the Kama Sutra Million Positions to Incredible Sex when I felt someone behind me. I got my "cat ate the cream" grin before I turned because I thought it was book boy. But no, not book boy, this was a real handsome Asian man in a Giorgio Armani suit, cut to fit him. OMG! He smelled of very fragrant cigar smoke (normally a turn off) and he was bald (really finding this look to be sexy). He reached passed me and touched a copy of the translated Kama Sutra book nestled next to the pseudo-erotica. He said if I really wanted an excellent reference that this was the book for me rather than the commercialised trash I was perusing. He was so close I could smell the intoxicating scent he was wearing and see the laugh lines at the corners of his chocolate brown eyes. His eyes were not on the books though, but gazing deep into mine. I think I stopped breathing, but I am not certain. He introduced himself and I reciprocated. I asked if he was from the area and he said he was here on business from Atlanta. He asked me if I was interested in getting a drink with him and I barely got the word "YES" out. He offered his hand to me and I took it. As we walked out of the store, we passed a very startled book boy who got only a wave from me in response to his "Hey Sassy". On a side note...teee heee heee...boy is he eating his heart out!

So after a few pineapple martinis at my favorite bar which doubles as a cigar lounge (Asian Delight loved the place). We moved on to his hotel room and let me tell you....he gave Kama Sutra new meaning to me. How did this incredible night end? Did we exchange phone numbers and promise to stay in touch? Well, I noticed--most belatedly--that Asian Delight was wearing a wedding ring in the light of day. I was so freakin blinded by lust that I just did not notice it. I have never been in the habit of looking for wedding bands on men's hands. Dammit! I really need to be more vigilant! So now I am wavering between guilt and pleasure. *sigh* Same old thing....I go after what I can't have even subconsciously. What the hell is wrong with me?????

Labels: Asian Delight, Book Boy, dating, sex

I have been fighting a sinus infection for weeks now...guess I ran myself down during tax season with the crazy hours and hopping social life.

So much to tell and I am sorry I have not kept up with everyone's blogs. I can be such a slacker.

The Men:

1. Art professor got kicked to the curb. We met face-to-face and well, he had this depressed air about him and I just had to say no. When I told him I did not think it was going to work, he told me I was the someone special he has been searching for (*sigh*)--why is it always the wrong man saying the right thing?

2. Adorable...hotter than anyone I have ever been with. Father is dying of cancer and he has gone MIA. Somehow, I think he is just to be a really fab memory and I will be pining for the incredible sex for a long time to come.

3. Hot College Guy...in the lead at the moment. He is steady & dependable. We talk almost everyday and we see each other pretty regularly. He thinks I am awesome and I think he is pretty awesome too. I don't see a future in it, but it is good for right now.

4. Larry the Cable Guy...a great buddy. We enjoy going out to dinner & movies. He is pretty cool, but I'm not attracted to him and I don't believe he is attracted to me. It works for me...hang out with no strings.

5. Mr. Dad....decided to give him a try even though he has kids because his kids are older. However, despite being a successful business man, he comes with mucho baggage....psycho ex-wife, troubled kids....I ran and have not looked back.

6. Mr. Corvette...going through mid-life crisis, but I would go out with him once if I got to ride in his corvette.

7. Found out Biker Dude ditched me to go back to his ho that was pre-me. His best friend has made the moves on me....yikes! Biker Dude sent me an email this week like we are still good friends (barf!).

So that is the man recap.

Dance:

I started back with dancing. I travel to Charlotte, NC to the Queen City Ballroom. Nikolai is my dance instructor. Not only is he hawt!, but we dance very well together. I also started some private sessions on ballet & modern dance to sharpen my ballroom moves. Between the dance, yoga & aerobics, I continue to lose weight and I am getting into some really sexy adorable clothing to showcase the girls. My friends, Jadey and Bea, have been instrumental in finding me some awesome clothing to go dancing in. We have also been hanging out in a latin club that opened up down the road from my apartment. The owner just loves us and we get treated like queens. He makes sure he sends his dancer/studs to us for a turn on the dance floor. This week, he made a special run down the street to get us mint for our mojitos. I love the goddess treatment.

Work:

I am really going to go full force with marketing efforts to get my accounting business off the ground. Got some things shaping up for me!

School:

Only 5 weeks left and I will have my BBA! Woo baby! Then a little break. I will be enrolling in a Master of Accountancy with concentration in Forensic Accounting after that. I finally decided what I want to be when I grow up. A CSI in the accounting world. I will sit for the Certified Fraud exam and for the CPA exam. Just two more years of schooling to go! I can do it (I think).

so what is new with you guys????????

Labels: dancing, dating, school, sex, work

Life was crazy this week with all the dates:

1. I met Larry the Cable Guy. Actually he turned out to be nice & funny. I am not attracted, but I would hang out with him once in a while. And Joseph was a spaz and never showed up to see my hot outfit, but I decided I just don't care.

2. I rescheduled my date with the Art Professor...just too exhausted with my work schedule to make the trip down to see him.

3. Since I stayed in town on Friday nite, I hooked up with Hot College boy for date #2. It went very very well...until he kissed me. Even in a haze of several beers...the kissing was awful! Okay, and then he told me he loved me. Yikes! Well, and then there was the overbearing attitude cloaked in sweetness. I canceled date #3 and have not returned his phone calls or Im's.

4. Karma is a Bitch! Adorable Country Boy never showed up for our date today. I guess it is conceivable there is a legitimate reason (his father has cancer), but he never called, never Im'd, never emailed and he did not respond to my text message. The list is going to naturally devolve back down to zero and maybe I will look into some nunnery brochures because the enforced celibacy is killlllllllingggggg me.

Labels: dating, sex

So last nite at dinner, Joseph and I split a pizza and a pitcher of beer--both of which I love. Now Joseph insisted we equally split the pitcher of beer, not because he was worried about the waste of it, but because he knows I get the giggles when I drink too much. So, here is another secret I will let you in on--sex has the same tendency as too much drink---I get the giggles. Anyway, the giggles I got (from the beer) and Biker Dude capitalized on that with his witty banter and jokes. My sides hurt from laughing so much and I was crying like crazy! Thank goodness I did not wear mascara yesterday.

My once-upon-a-friend called me again last night to talk for almost an hour--just like old times. This time she made no mention of my conforming to her standards--she just wanted to talk like we once did.

Today, I worked from home in anticipation of 100% frozen precipitation--what a joke! I guess five snowflakes meet the 100% requirement, but I was cheated out of a couple of inches of this stuff. Joseph and I wanted to be snowed in and we got zippo! But the man is cooking his Italian feast for me tonight and he assures me that some bedroom action is assured so the night will be a success by any standard.

On another note, my Keurig B-50 died. I guess Joseph and I have put it through its paces. Being a convenience girl, I decided to shop Ebay and buy another one rather than deal with warranty issues. The coffee maker is mere months old, but who the hell knows where the receipt is. So I upgraded and the seller tells me that they have sold out and he is sending me the B-70 Platinum instead for no extra money. That puppy came in yesterday on my out my front door and I will be spending the weekend with Joseph so it will be Sunday before I can take it for a testdrive.

And Sunday---massage day. My friend Jadey is going to hook me up with a great hot stone massage and then we are headed to a pilates class and then the movies. It will be a great girl's day out. I am so looking forward to those plans and I am sure I will need them after fending Mandy's groping hands this weekend and playing an unending game of Candyland, Barbies, and Shrek Operation. Did I mention her father has her hooked on his favorite childhood cartoon of Speed Racer? Ugh! That is all I have to say. I saw episode 2 --count'em--6 times last time the rugrat was visiting. I will be ready for a pitcher of mojitos and some adult conversation about men & sex.

Hope everyone has an awesome weekend!

Labels: beer, friends, Joseph, sex

Since Joseph turned 40, you would think he had become 400 instead! Now I hear how he can't keep up with his "Nympho" girlfriend! Thankfully he is just teasing! Being with a man who actually enjoys sex is such a refreshing change from the prior 9 years. He is too much of a gentleman to brag, but I know he loves the fact that I am always a willing partner. I think someone forgot to install an "off" switch in me. Oh well, it is a great ride. I love sex and I am proud of it!

Joseph never slept on silk sheets until he met me...he is as addicted to them as I am. There really is nothing that compares to 100% silk. Oftentimes I hop into bed and he has stripped down to nothing...not for me...but because it feels so damn sensuous to have all that silk wrapped around your body. He had insomnia until he met me, but he claims that the silk sheets have cured him (I think it is me, but that is a story for another day). I finally gave him a mismatched set of silk sheets to put on his bed so we can enjoy the sensation no matter which house we are at. I also want to confess that we have worn out a pair of silk sheets in the 2.5 months we have been together. Yup, you heard right...wore those puppies out. Thankfully, Ebay has such great prices on them! I guess I need to buy stock in a silk sheet company, because I think this is going to be a frequent occurence.

Seriously, if you have never had silk sheets--rush don't walk to buy them. I swear it is like heaven on earth...they are incredible feeling...the cool feel on the skin, soft like an angel's wing. It defies describing, but it does add a certain je ne sais quois to the sexual experience.

When I started on the dating adventure, I purchased a few books and a couple of videos to study up on. One erotic dvd is the Kama Sutra/Tau of Sex combo. I decided that since I did not keep the hubby even remotely interested that I needed to make some changes for the next man. Well, I have only watched about 5 minutes of the video and glanced at the books. Joseph assures me that I have all the right stuff already, but we have decided to watch the dvds together...one of these years! Although, what he could learn, I have no clue. He has it going on. He is quite the athlete in bed and sometimes, he exhausts me! Most of the time, it is me exhausting him though. We laugh that he wants to die in my arms having the big one.

Okay, you guys are probably grossed out within an inch of your lives and are telling me to shut the hell up because all this detail is hurting your eyes. Sorry 'bout that my bloggo friends, but it was the burning topic on my mind for some reason. I think it is to get my mind off a sad phone call I received last night. An old friend who drifted from my life called to tell me that she has breast cancer and that the prognosis is not good. I broke down and cried and went to bed crying. The bitch of the situation for me is that I am not welcome in her life despite her needing me unless I conform to certain religious standards she has. I want to be there when she comes out of surgery next week, but I am not welcome. Yes, weird that she would even call me...I feel powerless and frustrated. I feel a deep loss and not a little resentment that she would try to manipulate me with such a devastating disease. So I will pray and cry for her.

Joseph called me last night while I was on the phone to her. I called him back and when he asked what I was doing, I just broke down all over again. He came over and he did what he does best...he made me laugh and he held me. While I cried in his arms in bed, we had a deep theological discussion of faith, God, death, and true love. As we were drifting off to sleep, Joseph thanked me for really listening to him and valuing his opinion. This man amazes me not only with his deep faith, but because he is far more intelligent than I am. He is amazed that I find him so fascinating. He is far too modest to subscribe to my belief that he is a genius, but that is okay.

Labels: Joseph, sex, silk

We had a great date last night. #1 boy thinks I am a great cook, incredible decorator, and (of course!) adorable. The twins garnered a lot of attention in their showstopping top.

The End

Ryan and I were discussing bad sex today. I commented that bad sex encounters should not count toward anything. If this is true, I think the last time I really had sex was 2000. The sad state of affairs must change, they must! Ryan is going to start a prayer chain for me to get laid. Tee hee!

Labels: Bible Boy, boobs, dating, sex

So...I am going to have to change bible boy's nickname (he is not as he seems and that is a good thing). I just have not decided what that name will be yet. Booty call boy? Babelicious boy? Loverboy? Time will tell. For now, he will be #1 boy. #1 wants to whisk me off for a weekend. I said (drumroll please) yes.

What has changed Sassy? you ask as you scratch your heads in puzzlement. I don't know, except to say that we have been doing a lot of talking and the more we talk, the more I like him. And that spark that was missing? It was just a delayed ignition. So perhaps, just perhaps I have the right combo: hottie + respect + available + great sex?????

Most importantly, he understands where I am at right now and there is no pressure from him. He is letting me advance the friendship as fast or slow as I want. How can I resist someone who thinks I am a sex goddess? For now, for today, it is enough.

(Sassy smiles to herself)

Labels: Bible Boy, sex

Last night was date #2 with bible boy. All in all it was a great date. I had a delightful evening with a very attentive man. I enjoyed the compliments: You look great tonight, you have terrific fashion sense, you are sexy (and yes, your chest is amazing!)...the list goes on...and yes, my head got a little big. Bible boy is a good listener and he said he was spellbound by my storytelling abilities.

I just don't get the bible boy + heathen girl dynamic, but a friend came up with a answer: I am a challenge to him, someone he can rescue. I think my friend got it right because bible boy thinks I am the answer to his prayers and that God sent me to him. The fallacy of this statement is this: wouldn't God inform me that bible boy is the answer to my prayers? Oops forgot, I don't pray anymore.

In another lifetime I would have considered bible boy the perfect catch for me. I do find him attractive (although the sexual spark is not there like it was/is with book boy) and he treats me very well. It is just...bible boy is making long-term plans for us to travel the globe together. I kid you not. This, despite me telling him I just want to be friends and I'm not ready for a relationship. Sex would be good, but that would = commitment to him. I got an email from him today and he has already planned our next date around mapping out our travel plans. My eye is twitching and I feel like I am suffocating. Yikes! Calgon take me away. Ryan's advice is to sit him down and explain how hectic my life will be from now til 2009 with my new business, graduating in July and going straight into my masters program. I don't know that he will hear me. So I am open to suggestions--bring them on.

I really would like to meet a man with the sexual chemistry, charm, and intelligence of book boy and the sweetness and honesty of bible boy. I wonder if such a man exists?? Anyway, I am losing interest fast in the whole dating thingy. Some fabulous sex with an available hottie who treats me with respect would be nice, but me thinks I am not going to find that....somehow something will be left out of the equation as my experience with book boy taught me: hottie + fabulous sex; hottie + respect; hottie + no respect + not so hot sex + unavailable. I am sure there are more equations, but I am equationed out right now.

Labels: Bible Boy, dating, Max, SassyKat, school, sex

Right now is a very exciting time for me and it has nothing to do with men! I have had this awesome idea for a business for 10 years, but it was really just a germ of an idea until about 6 months ago when it became a very insistent thought. I just wanted to find a partner because it is a large undertaking and I wanted someone to help with the burdens & joys. Last week something really incredible happened! At school, we have study teams and we had a fellow student join our team for the current class only. So we are sitting at the coffee shop where we meet as a team to work on our projects and she said something. I frankly cannot remember what she said, but I got home and the lightbulb went off in my head and I said "She is the ONE". So I approached her the next night and asked her if she would be interested in being my business partner. This girl is as enthusiastic as I am about the whole idea. We are now an LLC and we should have everything in place by January 1. I cannot believe I am finally seeing the realization of this dream. It is fantabulous!

2. Moroccan lamp for the bordello glow

3. The curves got it going on

4. Hollywood Glamour/Silk Sheets

5. Favorite new artist find: Lou de Vignac

There you go! Some really cool purchases that are jazzing my new apartment up. Toodles! Have a great weekend everyone! I know I am going to. :)

Labels: dating, sex, shopping, work

So, tonight was the big night with Chris the cute book boy....and it will be the last too. I was sitting across the table from him and he kept talking about how this girl was cute, that one had a great ass...I got the message loud and clear. Yes, we did kiss, yes it was intense, but...but I lost interest. Just like that. He kept going on how I wanted a long-term thing. I am not in the market for one of those. I just got out of one. I want to be with a man who focuses on me rather than every girl in the place. The passion just went zip....David, I think you were right!Bye cute book boy!

So cute book boy & I parted with the agreement to do coffee one Saturday morning. I don't see it happening and I think my trips to the out-of-the-way bookstore are over. thank goodness...I need my chai latte when I shop for books. I am ready to put this book on the shelf where it belongs. And, and tonight I became the kind of woman I despise--I broke the best friend code and cancelled plans with Ryan to meet book boy for dinner instead of coffee. Sorry Sorry Sorry, Ryan--will not happen again. I just don't like that being done to me and I promise I won't do it to you again. I will make it up to you--brunch at Panera's on Saturday sound good? We can relive Brian Regan's show while we munch on souffles and drink chai.

I heard from Max (the Italian Stud #1) and we rescheduled our date for next week. Tonight when I got home I started chatting with another Chris (aka Italian Stud #2). He is a hottie from the dating site. He is calling me tomorrow (I think) and we are going to set up something...probably go dancing. I also got a phone call from a voice from the past. I was very very surprised. I can't go into any more details than that, but he is another hottie (henceforth he will be Italian Stud #3) that I have panted over for several years now. What are you up to Italian Stud #3--this is a drastic change in your mo. Are you trying to seduce me? Have I mentioned I really dig Italian men? I mean they curl my toes and make me tingle all over with those accents and dark good looks.

Philip, Mr. DC, is interesting, but he is not a good IM'er. We shall see if we chat again...he was kind of weasily about answering some basic questions--probably married or seeing someone or he just has a really sucky dial up connection like he claimed. Kelley, my slightly religious date for the weekend is soooo sweet. He sent me an email and told me he likes my sparkling conversation & beautiful smile and cannot wait to spend Sunday with me. He definitely is aiming to please me...just as long as that does not involve reading scripture together. Now I have to decide whether to thrill him a bit with some mega cleavage or if I should go more subtle with a turtleneck? Ah, the decisions of a dating SassyAssy. Dating is exhausting work with all these guys to keep up with. I am not complaining, but I am very tired.

Labels: Book Boy, dating, friends, Italian, Max, sex

The dating pool is kind of scary...at least from an online perspective...some really, um, "interesting" guys emailed me and then there is this auto chat thingy on the one site. I did not realize it until this box pops up and this guy says, "U R Sexy and I really want to kiss you". No, hello, no introduction, he just jumped right to the heart of the issue. Unfortunately, for him, the feeling was not reciprocal. A few minutes ago I had a much older gentleman try to arrange a date with me on this same tricky chat box (he was dull, old, and chubby). I wonder if I can turn the chat feature off? I then got an email offering me five free days on one of the better known paid date sites. I might check that out tomorrow night. I might just scrap this whole idea because men seem to be crawling out of the wood work attracted to my mystical or is that mythical adorableness? Who came up with that word anyway? What does it mean in man-speak--you have a great ass? You look like a cheap date? You are screaming sex baby?

I headed out to dinner tonight with my wannabee roomie. His last day at the firm is tomorrow so I got a little group together to take him out to dinner. The little group shrunk and it was just the two of us. He is a charming and very flirty older man. He insisted on buying the drinks and dinner and we had several hours of intriguing conversation. He ended the evening with a hug and this comment: "I am regretting something right now...I regret that I am married, I regret that I am leaving this area because you are special. You are adorable (did someone have a sale on that word this week?) and sweet and beautiful. I really want to have a relationship with you. He then kissed me and told me he loved me. I was speechless...I mean it is not like we have had anything more than watercooler chat at work and the occasional flirty comment. I declined the offer of the relationship, but I did not decline his offer to drive his fast, sporty convertible. I know he did not mean the love comment except in the sense that he would love to take me to bed, but it sure came as a surprise that he was that attracted to me. So I guess it is a good thing I did not take him in as a roomie...apparently he had eyes on my bed rather than the blow up mattress on the floor.

Max has asked for a second date. He is taking me to the movies this week, so we shall see how that goes. I am also getting together with the gay ex-boyfriend this weekend. I hope to have an interesting blog from that evening. At least, I think he is gay. He did sound very excited about going out with me, must be that adorableness that I am radiating lately. And Chris the book boy...I plan to see him on Friday nite. I just might ask him over for coffee. I might just take that chance. A good booty call is getting to be a necessity.

Labels: Book Boy, dating, Max, sex

1. Saucy SassyAssy Scores
2. Sassy Gets Her Groove On
3. Sexy Adorable Sassy Smiles


After a fabulous dinner with my friend Dana tonight, I went by the bookstore to see my favorite cute book boy, Chris. I wanted to see if the book I ordered came in (nudge, nudge, wink, wink). So Chris has me follow him to the back of the store to see if it came in. As he goes to the store room, he turns around and says "You look so gorgeous tonight". Well, I lit up like a Christmas tree. He comes out and says, "it is not back here, so let me get your number and I will call you when it comes in." We go back up to the front of the store and he gets my info and then we just start chatting. We are the only people in the store and it is about 8:30.

I found out:
a) he is 30 years old
b)originally from California (no wonder I found him attractive)
c)has a 19 year old girlfriend in Philly
d)we have a lot in common
e)we both hate it here, but it is cheap to live here
f)we walk to the beat of our own drum


So he tells me "I am dying to ask you out, but I have a girlfriend. You are beautiful, adorable, I love your sexy hair--short hair is soooo sexy to me. I love talking with you. I want to spend time getting to know you." I turn on the 1000 watt smile and I say, "Call me, we can just hang out--grab a beer or coffee and talk some more." So Mr. Chris said he would definitely call me and then he gave me a huge lingering hug. SassyAssy can't stop smiling. I sashayed out the store & down the hall while Mr. Chris stared longingly after me. Am I a bad girl for not caring that he has a 19 year old girlfriend whom he has not seen in 3 months? Am I wicked for tempting him? I am basking in the glow of his compliments: beautiful, adorable, sexy. It has been far too long since I had a man want me whom I want in return. It has been even longer since I heard such delightful descriptives directed at me. Ohmigod! And he hugged me so tight!

I know it may be the thought of a booty call that has his attention, but I think it is more than that. The chemistry between us is tangible and he is a cute book boy afterall! I cannot stop smiling! Perhaps this will be a good and wonderfully memorable month afterall.

Labels: Book Boy, dating, sex

I breathed a sigh of relief today at approximately 10:00am when I loaded the last box of belongings from the ex's house. Except for one more trip to get SassyKat, I am done with that life, those memories. I received validation this week on my suspicions that he has been seeing someone for quite some time. I don't care, he is her problem now, but it got me wondering at what point do you know a relationship is over? I mean the more subtle clues: when you stop talking about meaningful things; when you realize you have not seen that person in a while and you don't care; when you don't think about the other person's feelings; when our thoughts lead us down the road of blaming the other person for our unhappiness.

Maybe we are not meant to be with just one person...marriage should have the option to be renewed each year. Frankly, marriage has left a bad taste in my mouth and I cannot imagine going down that path again. I think people fall into two categories: free spirits and relationship-bound. I just wish I had realized oh-so long ago that I am the free-spirit type. I don't need to be in a relationship to find fulfillment. I enjoy my alone time and the freedom to go when and where I want without taking into account someone else. Don't get me wrong, I love sex and I enjoy male attention, but the daily chore of being with someone is not for me. I really subscribe to the K.T. Oslin philosophy of "Live Close By, Visit Often".

Friends have been calling often to check up on me since I moved into my apartment. Friends making sure that I am holding on emotionally. That means more to me than any wedding band. One good thing that has come out of the train wreak I called a marriage is a small fortress of friends who have rallied around me. For the first time in a long time I feel blessed with unselfish love. Despite being sick as a dog, my friend Ryan trooped over to my house at 7:15 this morning to help me get 100% moved. I had to twist her arm to let me buy her lunch as a thank you. She did not complain about the boot camp workout I put her through one last time, but she did make me promise to hire professional movers if I move again.

I have slipped through so many doors of change recently; I have exchanged false friends for true, real family for an adopted, motley assortment of family, a false lover for a place of my own. I don't normally like change, but I am embracing it more and more. I don't understand the forces that causes friends to lose touch, to lose love, but I do know that ultimately everthing that happens works out for the best and that truth will always reveal itself whether we wish it or not.

Labels: dating, friends, moving, sex, the Ex