My friend Jadey gave me and Bea tickets to the musical Menopause the Musical last night. I was looking pretty hot in my cute black mini-skirt and sexy little top with a hint of the phenomenal tits framed in a bit of ruffled purple bra that deliberately peeked through. I had to run an errand in our trendy downtown restaurant/bar area before meeting up with Bea. I managed to catch the eye of five men in one of the trendy bars apparently. The "point man" they sent out to me baffles me though:

I was standing down the block from the bar learning against a building on my cell phone when he approached me and asked if he could use my phone. Well, I was a bit annoyed with this guy right from the get-go and the wall of alcohol fumes emanating from him would have knocked me over had I not been leaning against the wall already. This guy must have been at least 60 and he definitely thought he still had it going on. Anyway, Sassy let the man use her phone to make his "call". I am fairly certain it was a wrong number. As soon as he got off he asked if I was from the area and when I said yes he said he had not seen me around and would definitely notice me. I shrugged waiting to be handed my phone. He then asked if he could buy me a beer and gestured to the aforementioned bar. I glanced over when he gestured and there were no less then 4 of his fellow businessmen gawking at what must be considered the worst pick-up routine of this year. Let's hope they were taking notes of what not to do. Then I realize the old guy could not pry his eyes off the girls and he asked me if I were cold (I had no jacket on). I said I was meeting a friend and had to go. Now, a great scenario would have been: younger man, not sloshed, who came up and said "You caught my eye, may I buy you a drink and get to know you." But nooooo...I get the flakes & psychos. Some things never change (right Diane?)!

I get to Jadey & Bea's business to pick up Bea and I told Jadey my story. She started laughing and said, "Darling, you look positively ravishing with the girls all showcased like that. I am surprised you didn't have a line of men following you down the street for a closer look."

Anyway, Menopause the Musical is funny. I really wasn't sure what to expect, except that I figured the entire female population of my town was going to be there. It was quite funny--especially the last couple of numbers: a very interesting take on the song "Good Vibrations". I am sure the 20 men in the audience were ready to flee in embarrassment.

Have a great weekend my dear blogger buddies!

Labels: boobs, men, worst pick-up ever