Bride and the Anti-Bride
Smug aka my best friend finally decided to join the blogger ranks. I think she is getting addicted to the healing properties of blogging. I guess she will have to comment on whether that is true or not.
I just know that when I ask her anything about the wedding (40 something days away) that her face lights up like a Christmas tree. I can't remember if I felt like that when I was getting married. I believe I did have that pre-wedding glow, but too much has passed since then to erase the memories of those particular feelings. I am a bit envious of her youthful optimism and obvious "in love" demeanor. I think sometimes that I am too burnt around the edges to ever feel that gooey love stuff and I hate that. I have always been such a romantic and to hear me talk now you would never believe it.
I was reading an article in Marie Claire today called "I, Fembot" and it could have been written about me. It discusses "a new breed of steely female"--one that does not cry easily and cringes at the thought of touchy-feely intimacy. I found one example resonated with me: "Lori had separated from her husband, a lead weight of a guy whom she had worked relentlessly to please. She decided it was time to focus on pleasing herself. 'When you go through a separation, you learn that you have to take care of yourself. There's a hardening, for better or for worse.'" While I do admit that I have a need for a lot of personal space, I hope that one day I will heal enough to feel the incredible sensation of falling and being in love.
When I look at Smug trying on her wedding gown, it gives me hope. When I apply her make-up for her bridal portrait and see that beautiful smile and inner glow outshine any Lancome product I could apply, I feel my heart twitch a little bit. Isn't she just lovely?Labels: anti-bride, bride, Ryan, Smug
posted by SassyAssy @ Wednesday, August 08, 2007
6 Comments:
I don't think you are a Fembot...I think you are finding yourself after a horrible experience. If you were a romantic, I think you'll return to that eventually. You just need to focus on yourself for a while. And yes, she's lovely.
a new breed of steely female"--one that does not cry easily and cringes at the thought of touchy-feely intimacy
I'm sorry to say, but I do fit this category, but only by mere fact that just I adore Austin Powers' references--Yeah, baby!
Magicmckay--welcome! You are a sweetie!
Lucy--Ya'know, I am not surprised, maybe you can incorporate into your standup routine.
I think that you have been burned enough to learn what you want and how you want to be treated and will no longer settle for anything less! This is not a bad thing - I feel that this is who I am also, and as soon as I became sure of who I was and what I was important (not to mention had time to heal) I found Chris and all my "youthful Optimism returned. It will happen for you too, but not until you are ready!
As for blogging - It does help to relieve stress and get things off my chest! I love it!
Now this is a post that gives me something to think about, Sassy. Fodder for thought...
Sassy- I understand how you feel and I think it is something alot of women go thru after a painful marriage and divorce.
It just takes time and then one day when you least expect you find someone that makes you feel all warm and fuzzy.
It took me over 10 years to realize that most men are not real jerks as my ex was.
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