Ya'know, I read articles all the time and I hear women comment that they cannot find a man who wants to commit. I find men who want to marry me after one conversation (gack)!

I was sent an email by a nice looking man. He passed my initial perusal of his profile: he can spell, write a semi-creative paragraph or two about himself, he was older than my stepson, and he had his picture posted. As we exchanged emails, it was revealed that he was a professor at a local university and new to the area. Hmmmmmm....potential! So we started chatting to arrange a date. We chatted for two hours. During the course of the chat, I got real excited because the professor had just moved from FL and had been teaching at the university I am getting my masters from! Wow!

He called me and we talked for a bit more, but by then I was ready to flee! Since he is new to the area, he asked if I would drive to his town to meet him--no problem at all; however, I have been sick since Monday. First, he tried to pressure me to drive up immediately to have dinner with him and I deflected him until Wednesday.

Second, he went off on this tangent that it was fate that drew us together and that I was The ONE he has been searching for! Slow that train down dude! This is a date site not a marriage site.

Third, he started talking about how we will spend pretty much every waking moment together after our date. OMG--I am ready to flee the state and change my name! So I have not been excited about this date like I was initially.

Yesterday morning I was still ill so I sent him an email politely asking if we can postpone since I was still quite sick. Again, he tried to pressure me to drive to see him (umm, I have a FEVER dude). Then he lectured me that he rearranged all his plans to see me Wednesday. My reply: I have no control over when I get sick. So this freakshow has been diverted until next Wednesday. Meet Professor God.

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I got stood up by a dickhead on Tuesday night. I gave him 10 minutes and then I was outta there. I got home to an email: "I hope you didn't show up Sassy. Since I never heard from you (it had been two days since I agreed to meet him for coffee) I decided you weren't going to show." Now you would think Mr. Brilliant Deductions would have sent an email earlier that day to confirm whether we were still on rather than afterward. He got moved into the Sassy graveyard while I was still at Starbucks tapping my nails.

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The anti-engineer called me last night to inquire if I was going to throw in the towel and go to the doctor. Jeez are you my mother???? I know he wants another date, but back off. He keeps saying "I wish I could read your mind and know what you are thinking". My reply is "You never will." So now he went on a tangent that I must not be emotionally ready to date again if I can't tell him what I am thinking about. A perfectly valid argument if we have been seeing each other for months, but after two dates?

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I have a date tomorrow night with another professor who teaches at the same university as Professor God. He is a science (biology) professor, age 32, can spell, write very funny, charming, long emails. He is driving to my town to take me out to dinner. He came up with a menu of choices for me for our night out. He can dance rumba, cha-cha, etc. He loves music and he reads books. He is knowledgeable about art and he travels. He is not pushy, but he does like to debate (what is it about science guys & the debate/argue dynamic?). He does not have a picture posted, but I was able to google him and he is single. No idea what he looks like though. . He is of Slavic origin and says he still has a heavy accent. He has made no declarations that I am THE ONE, merely that I sound like a lot of fun to hang around with. Here is hoping that Sci-Fi Guy does not have three eyes and wears a beanie. I did see his salary (it is a matter of public record apparently) and well, I think I made more in retail. So I almost feel the need to volunteer to pick up the dinner tab, but I will restrain myself. He will just have to find a way to finance these dates if we continue to see each other.

Labels: dating hell